The Telling of Christmas 2005
by SignedSealedWritten
Summary: JJ has a plan up her sleeve, and she's not giving up. There will be payback - blackmail photos, candy canes, Christmas trees, mistletoe, a dare gone wrong and one very special appearence by Santa Claus.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: **In a previous one of my stories – entitled Turning Point – a reference was made to a blackmail photo involving JJ and Reid during Christmas 2005. I had no intentions of writing this "party" that I had referenced – but I got so many requests that I could no longer resist. The story of what had happened during Christmas 2005 quickly grew in my head, until I could no longer ignore the urge to write it. I figured that, today being December 1, and that after Episode 100 everybody could use bit of a Christmas story, I would post it.

**Note: **Remember, this story takes place in the past – around Christmastime, 2005. Gideon and Ell are still there. Sorry that it means no Prentiss or Rossi for you guys – but at _somebody's _persistence, there is an upcoming one-shot involving Christmas Trees, Candy Canes, and JJ/Rossi. (-cough cough- You know who you are. It has been asked for and so it shall be written! My Christmas gift to you. :)

This story will be several chapters – I don't know how many yet. I hope that you enjoy – please review if you enjoyed it, or even if you didn't! You guys are awesome.

**The Telling of Christmas 2005**

"You've got to be kidding me." Elle Greenaway stated, a deer in headlights staring at the medium sized ball room she'd been ushered into by one Jennifer Jareau. Her dark eyes were wide in looking at the bare room before them. She turned her head towards the woman – whom until three seconds ago she'd considered to be her friend – with narrowed, dark brown eyes.

The fair woman stood with her hands placed on her hips, facing the room with determined eyes. "Hey, look, it won't take that long." She turned back towards her friend with apologetic blue eyes. "Besides, I'll buy you a drink afterwards." JJ made the promise with her head tilted slightly to the side. The only other object in the room besides the boxes and bags next to Jennifer Jareau's feet was the giant Christmas tree in the far corner of the room.

Elle sighed, but made no move to run like hell from the room. "I can't _believe_ you roped me into this."

Jennifer Jareau only smiled; a glint of mischief in her eyes. "The BAU has never had a Christmas party before, Elle." She shook her head and her blue eyes immediately took on a more somber note. "After all that we've seen this year, I can't_ not _give them that." The woman sighed. "I think we could all use a little Holiday spirit."

Elle sighed – she knew all too well what the BAU had been through. It was too easy to lose the holiday spirit among murdered victims, autopsies, case files, and UnSubs. "This is a complete surprise for everyone?" The profiler asked before shrugging her shoulders slightly. "Not like any of us have anywhere to go on the 23rd."

It was currently the twenty second of December – somewhere around eleven PM. Cases were slow this week – most of their work had been reports. JJ had approached her friend in the break room, claiming that she needed help with a 'project'. For a reason now beyond her own comprehension, Elle had agreed. JJ had picked her up – effectively ending any chance for the profiler to escape the clutches of their determined media liaison.

"Garcia is going to have to be in on it." JJ answered. "She's going to have to email everyone for us." The liaison laughed. "I'll corner her tomorrow at work."

"Like you did with me today?" The profiler asked, again narrowing her eyes at her friend.

JJ's lips twitched in a smile. There was a hopeful light in her eyes. She turned that light on her friend, hands clasped before her in a playing, begging gesture.

Elle's shoulders slumped in defeat, and JJ's eyes lit up even more. The former woman's eyes went to the bags and box's by her friends feet. She sighed once more. 'You knew that I was going to help you, chica. You _took my car_."

JJ grinned. "Your car is sitting in your driveway, waiting for you when you get home. All I did was insist to drive you." She picked up one of the boxes in her arms, shoving it towards Elle. "That may or may not have been part of the plan." Elle took the box in her arms, groaning. Looking down, she saw the box to be full of something glittery and silver – tinsel.

The liaison was in rare mood today – playful and high spirited in the coming holidays, removed from the pressure and horror of her every day job. "Out of my way, woman on a mission." JJ pushed past her friend, a bag of tree lights in her hand; she was headed towards the giant tree in the corner of the room. Elle didn't fail to notice that there were several gift bags beneath the tree.

Elle followed JJ, holding the box of tinsel. "The idea of you on a mission is scarier than most UnSubs I've met." She teased, setting the box of tinsel down by the tree.

JJ grinned while placing the first string of lights onto the tree. "Did I ever tell you I almost electrocuted myself the first time I tried to put tree lights on? I was thirteen." The woman admitted, reaching upwards to throw on the second string of lights.

Elle shook her head, an amused smile gracing her lips. "If you electrocute yourself right now, I'm going to be the one doing the paperwork. All night, chica."

"I'll try, but I make no promises." JJ said, biting back a laugh. Elle handed her the next looping string of multi-colored lights. The air in the rented ballroom smelled like Christmas trees and hard wood floors. She hadn't felt as free as she did now since she was a child – the holidays usually did this for her, but for the past few years she hadn't been able to celebrate as she'd liked. Now that she had the chance to do exactly that – and share it with her fellow co workers – she didn't plan to miss out on it.

Getting Elle to help was step one. She hadn't seen enough happiness from the woman since she'd joined the bureau.

The profiler handed her another loop of lights, which she hung on the tree – having to stand on her tip toes to do so. "I hope you know I'm going to get you back for this." Elle said, and JJ turned back to laugh. "I'm serious. Quite. Serious."

"I'll hold you to it."

**TBC**

Author's Note Two:

Please review! This is going to be quite a lot of fun – and I promise a Christmas story involving Prentiss, as well, if this one does well.

Happy Holidays!

SSW


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: **I'm quite ecstatic about all the reviews I got! I plan for this story to have something of a chapter a day until Christmas. There was also a **typo** in the first chapter: it said that it was 'currently the twenty third of December'. It was meant to say that it was currently the 'twenty second' of December – the party takes place the next day. It's been fixed. Also – _cats_ – twenty week old kittens who think it's hilarious to try and use my keyboard. All typos are their fault. (Aforementioned kittens are named Lewis and Clark.)

Oh, and yes, **remember this is in the past**. Meaning that there are people still here.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own anything you find familiar here. Aforementioned kittens are mine. Said kitten (Clark) is chewing the cord for my laptop. Oh boy. Here he comes. –covers keyboard-

**The Telling of Christmas 2005**

"So … are you going to tell me what's in those bags?" Elle Greenaway was sitting on the edge of a wooden table, one ankle crossed over the other. The small table was stationed next to the Christmas tree. In one hand, the Elle held a glass of eggnog – bless the woman that knelt before the Christmas tree for bringing it.

"Just because you're in on it does _not_ mean I'm telling you all the stuff I've planned." JJ said, tossing tinsel on the branches. Elle had been considerably glad that JJ hadn't managed to electrocute herself in the process of hooking up the lights. JJ looked towards the seven bags – each of them hiding something she had planned for the party that would start at six the next day. "Also, try helping." She reached behind her and tossed a bag of Christmas crepe paper to her friend.

Elle shrieked and caught the crepe paper in her free hand, sending JJ a pointed glare. She pushed herself off of the table. "I feel like Santa's helper." She muttered. "I'd say _elf_, but I'm too tall – and elves don't carry guns."

JJ pressed her lips together, trying in vain not to burst out laughing. Her hands were sticky with sap from the tree. It was nearly 11:30 at night.

"Where do you want the … crinkly paper?" Elle asked, standing in the middle of the ballroom floor, eyebrows raised.

"Somewhere. Everywhere." She swept her hands around the room. "Make it pretty, Scrooge." JJ winked one blue eye, and Elle fought the urge to say something she'd later regret. The dark haired woman settled for a muttered "bah, humbug" before she began to string up the 'crinkly paper' near the stage at the front of the room.

The tree finished, JJ stood back up and dusted her hands off. If she closed her eyes, she could already imagine the room filled with her co-workers. Watching Elle put up the paper was like a Christmas gift in itself – there was never enough holiday spirits around her work, especially not with the things they saw on a daily basis. The fact that they had no case at the moment was another gift – it would have been impossible for the liaison to pull off a party like this if they'd been called away, even _with_ all the contacts that she'd gained over the years.

"What're you doing for Christmas, Elle?" JJ pulled out a red table cloth from one of the bags, and began to stretch it over the table her friend had been sitting on moments before. She'd be placing all the food on the table when she came in tomorrow, earlier than the party would call for. Several other table cloths still sat in waiting in the bag. JJ pulled a round table from the corner of the room and dragged it to the edge of the dance floor. Brandishing a second table cloth, she covered the table quickly – it was big enough to fit all of the BAU.

"Home to Brooklyn." Elle answered, but there wasn't much happiness detected in her voice. "Just me and my mother."

JJ understood, then – it probably hadn't been the same since her father had died in the line of duty. After a moment's pause, JJ answered her own question. "I'm going home too – wonder what the rest of them are doing. I know Hotch is spending it with Haley and Jack."

Elle leaned against the wooden stage. "Please, please don't tell me that you have a karaoke machine somewhere." Her eyes were on one of the larger boxes sitting near the entrance of the room. Her change of subject didn't go unnoticed by JJ – but the liaison left the subject to be. She didn't' want to push her friend.

"If you'd like, you can be a help and hook it up on the stage." She answered instead, receiving a groan from Elle, who moved in an unhappy way to go hook up the machine. The profiler was already thinking of ways to get her friend back for this. Her lips turned upwards in a smile as an idea began to form in her mind.

"The room is missing a few things." She announced on completion of hooking up the karaoke machine, as suddenly as if the idea had only just come to her.

Startled, JJ turned to her friend. The surprise of Elle's sudden interest showed. "What's it missing? I pretty much picked up everything we could possibly need – we're even being catered." She informed her with a nod of her head.

"No, we're still missing a few things." Elle pursed her lips and shrugged her shoulders. "I'll go out to get them, if you want." She let her eyes drift to where JJ's keys were sitting.

"Uh, yeah. Sure, I guess so. That'd be a help." JJ said warily. Before she could blink, Elle had scooped up JJ's keys and was racing towards the door. Muttering to herself, JJ said, "I'm not going to find out what she's getting, am I?"

**TBC**

**Author's Note: **

**But you will, next chapter, as we join Elle on her side-journey. xD **

**Please review! The response I got last time was awesome. I'm enjoying this. **


	3. Chapter 3

**The Telling of Christmas 2005**

Elle Greenaway drove JJ's small blue sports car north for exactly six minutes and fifty three seconds before pulling into a parking lot lit by spotlights. The profiler parked the car in one of the free parking spaces, glad to see that the lights inside the store were still on. The Christmas Depot was always open late the day before Christmas Eve.

She got out of the car and closed the door behind her, swinging her pocketbook onto her shoulder. She'd come across the store earlier that year by accident – it was open year round, and he'd been looking for a home depot.

Elle grinned as she opened the door. There was nothing like a bit of Christmas revenge to lift her holiday spirits. Maybe she was being a bit vindictive, but she couldn't find it in her to care. The bell above the door chimed her entrance into the large store – it smelled like the Christmases she'd always dreamed of when growing up. Evergreens, gingerbread, peppermint, eggnog – all of it swarmed around her. She felt her heart jump at the remembrance of once high spirits she'd had when she was young.

Most of those feelings had ended the year her father had died.

Elle stepped deeper into the store, heading into the decorations area. Rows upon rows of Christmas cheer stood before her, but she only needed one small thing. The profiler ran a hand over the head of a plastic reindeer who didn't look like Rudolph, but rather like he'd contracted a nasty head cold. It was funny – but it wasn't what she was looking for.

Leaving the poor sick Reindeer, Elle made her way to the next aisle. If she'd paused for only a moment, she would have realized that the first part of JJ's mission was going well – she was enjoying herself. Elle knew not, however, of JJ's hidden agenda. Her main concern at the moment was the fact that the aisle before her looked promising.

Christmas wreaths filled the aisle – plastic, evergreen, twinkling fiber optic wreaths. She wasn't looking for a wreath, but this was where her item would be if she were to find it.

"I spy with my little eye …. something devious." She murmured a twinkle in her eye. Her hand reached out and snatched up the object she'd been searching for.

The dark haired woman held the bag before her eyes, and smiled. No Christmas party was really complete without it, after all. Elle could already imagine all the awkward situations this would create … and if some people _realized_ some things in the process, she'd consider the day all the merrier.

And, if the mistletoe in her hand never got used, it still made a pretty decoration.

Elle left the aisle with the mistletoe, but she wasn't done yet.

When she'd entered the store, she'd only had plans for the one item – but as she'd found the mistletoe, Elle couldn't help but feel more of the holiday spirit seep into her bones.

She hadn't had _this_ much Christmas cheer in over fifteen years.

--

Jennifer Jareau was pretty sure that she'd been abandoned. It wasn't the fact that Elle had left – it was that she'd left over two hours ago. The liaison mentally berated herself for not having seen this coming when Elle had left in the first place.

She was also fairly certain she was going to have to walk home, over ten miles, in the dark, in the middle of winter, in heels.

She was going to _kill_ Elle Greenaway.

JJ had been decorating by herself for the past two hours – hanging wreaths, greenery, setting the table … she'd made sure that everything for the next day was in order.

JJ touched her cell phone, gritting her teeth. She knew perfectly well that walking home was not an option. It was the middle of the night, and even though she was scared, she knew too much about the abduction factors of blonde woman to even truly consider it.

She couldn't believe it. She was going to have to call Garcia to come pick her up at one in the morning.

As her finger hovered on the button, she heard the door to the now decorated ballroom slam. JJ's hand almost went to her gun, but when Elle Greenaway stepped in, holding two bags and a plastic reindeer under one arm, she relaxed.

For a moment.

"Elle!" She exclaimed. "I have been decorating _all_ night. By myself. Where in the world did you _go_?" She couldn't stay mad for long, because there was something very nearly _merry_ about Elle Greenaway.

"This is Benadryl the Reideer." Elle stated, placing down the reindeer.

Laughter exploded from JJ's lips. "Why the name?"

"He looks like he could use some Benadryl." Elle said simply. "And look at his _eyes_ – doesn't he remind you of a certain young genius?" She fished around in one of the bags. "Close your eyes."

JJ balked. "Why?" She asked, suspiciously.

"So I can disappear and steal the karaoke machine." Elle teased. "C'mon, chica, close 'em! You've got trust issues."

"Only when I'm trying to trust the Brooklyn girl who went out and bought a plastic reindeer at one am." JJ said, but closed her eyes. She heard more fishing before something that felt like a headband was placed on her head.

"They came in pairs." Elle said as JJ opened her eyes, reached up, and took off the headband. With wide eyes, she held it before her. "I was thinking of having Hotch wear the other one, but I like keeping my head attached to my neck."

It was indeed a headband … with antlers. Felt reindeer antlers were wrapped with light up Christmas tree lights that blinked.

JJ grinned. "I got you into the spirit, didn't I?' She put the antlers back on.

"Maybe." Elle said, reaching into the bag again. "There's a matching one of those, and Reid's _so_ wearing it. " The Brooklyn native pulled out another hat – this one was a Santa's hat with plastic elf ears attached. "For Garcia."

"She'll love that." JJ paused. "Though Reid isn't going to be happy about the antlers."

Elle kept the mistletoe in the bag. "He'll learn to deal." She said definitively.

**Author's Note: **I'm sorry this chapter took so long. I hope that you enjoyed it – please review. I wish I could give every reviewer their own Reideer. If that was possible, I would. :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: **There was a _lovel_y little blooper in Chapter Three – it _should_ have said "though she was armed" instead of "though she was scared". I really don't know where that blooper came from, it's the furthest from "armed" you can possible get. All that the two words share are an 'r' and a 'd' and an 'a' … oh, and an 'e'. … Please ignore me, the rambling author. Oh, and while there probably will be pairings later on, in the slightest; it's mainly a team fic – unless I get tremendous support for a pairing one way or another. Though that mistletoe is a devious little fiend .. Also, yes, this chapter finishes up the decorating scene and moves into the next morning at the BAU.

Oh! Nobody noticed … or it wasn't commented on … it wasn't a typo when I said **REID**eer. Elle called it a **reid**eer. : ) I want one. If anyone _knows _of the existence of these creatures in real life, please let me know. It would make me a very happy author.

**The Telling of Christmas 2005**

"Can we take a rain check on that drink?" Elle asked, rubbing the heel of her hand against her tired eyes. She pulled her cell phone out of her back pocket, reading the digital numbers: 2:20 AM. "I'm going to fall asleep standing up."

"Yeah," JJ said. "Just let me run and use the restroom then I'll drive you home."

"It wouldn't be a problem if you'd let me drive here." Elle shot after her.

"If I'd let you drive here, you wouldn't have shown up." JJ called back, and Elle didn't dispute her – she didn't have time to. Quickly, she shuffled the mistletoe out of the plastic bag balanced on her knee. Looking constantly over her shoulder, she opened the package. She was pretty sure that JJ wouldn't agree with her meddling – but _hey_, she was the one who'd asked her to help. She was the one who could deal with the consequences. Grinning, she ripped open the package. Holding the mistletoe in one hand, she attempted to rip a piece of tape off with the other, and taped and hung the mistletoe about the entrance to the ballroom. By the time that JJ had come back, she'd hung the mistletoe in various places throughout the room, and was sitting _on_ the table, the picture of innocence.

--

**December 23****rd**

**Elle's Apartment**

She was quite sure that waking up this early in the morning had to be cruel and unusual punishment. Some part of the constitution had to have a system that disallowed getting up for work this early in the morning when you'd gone to bed so late.

Once JJ had dropped her off – making her _swear_ the secret wouldn't be spilled until Garcia got those emails out – she hadn't fallen asleep until 3:30 in the morning. There was too much jittery energy in her nerves – she honestly couldn't remember the last time that she'd been excited about a Christmas party. During the time she'd been working with the BAU, she'd grown more attached than she'd ever expected – they were more than friends, the Behavioral Analysis Unit of the FBI had formed something of a family that she'd had the privilege of being in.

Standing over the kitchen counter, she poured herself a cup of coffee in a futile attempt to wake herself up. Elle ran her hands through damp hair, leaning against the counter as she took a sip. She quickly poured it out – it was worse than the stuff they passed off as coffee back at headquarters.

JJ would be the one to ask Garcia to send out the email – meaning that the technical analyst would be in on the secret. The liaison would be bringing the hat to Garcia – with credit to Elle, of course – and the emails would be sent out around noon, asking the members of the BAU to join them for the first annual Christmas party.

And, for once, Elle was excited about something – and starting to realize that had been her friend's original intention. She had to give props to the woman – she was more profiler than she knew. Perhaps hanging out with the bunch of them was rubbing off on her – a curse as much as it was a gift.

**Author's Note Two: **

**I know this was a shorter chapter, but I couldn't help it – I really, really would appreciate a review, I'm quite … unsure about this chapter, it just doesn't feel right – but I promise, from this point on, things are going to be getting much, much better. Please stick around. **

**And please review – it lets me know that someone is reading!**


	5. Chapter 5

**The Telling of Christmas 2005**

The majority of the BAU's bullpen was decorated modestly for the season. There was a medium sized Christmas tree in one corner of the office that would be donated to one of the local children's hospitals on Christmas Eve. There was a wreath hanging on one of the dividers for the desks.

Besides that, decorations varied by desk. If JJ looked towards Gideon's desk, she would find the red and green wreath on his door. Morgan's desk had a Christmas elf sitting on the edge, no doubt given to him by Garcia. Reid's desk had several Christmas cards on it. She assumed from his mother, possibly a few friends back in Las Vegas. There was an un-eaten candy cane sitting on his desk. Elle's desk, previously bare, now had a new decoration – a Charlie Brown Christmas tree.

She looked towards Hotch's office, able to see inside. There was a wreath on the front of his desk, pictures abound. He'd never been happier since jack's birth, though at the moment he appeared laden by paperwork.

JJ continued Penelope Garcia's office, the Santa Elf had clutched in her hand, behind her back. Reaching the door of the office, she was sure Garcia's office would have enough decorations to fit the whole of Quantico.

She was right.

Stepping into the office, she felt she also stepped into the north pole. There was Christmas music playing, and Garcia, yet unaware of JJ's presence – was humming along to it. There was mistletoe and wreaths hanging around, tinsel and garland along the edges of the desks. The air smelled of peppermint and evergreen. She'd been correct about the origin of Morgan's desk elf – several more cheery elves sat on Garcia's computer. In the corner, an animated Santa sat in wait.

"Garcia?" JJ asked.

"Garcia's hand slammed down, turning off the music. "Jayje? Kris Kringle, you scared the life out of me." The woman turned to face her.

"Sorry." She apologized sheepishly. "Nice decorations."

Garcia grinned. "This is nothing, babe."

JJ rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "I've got a favor to ask of you."

Garcia paused. "Good, happy favor or creepy 'track the bad guy with the axe' favor?" She made air quotes.

"The first kind." JJ promised, but didn't say what it was just yet. Instead, she pulled out the Santa Elf hat and handed it to the technical analyst. "Courtesy of Elle."

"Seriously?" Garcia asked, turning over the hat in her hands.

"Yeah." JJ said. "Long story. I'll tell you about the Reideer, too. But first, the favor."

"At your service." Garcia joked, plopping the hat down on her head.

"Alright … then here's what I need you to do."


	6. Chapter 6

**The Telling of Christmas 2005**

He was sitting at his desk, going through the last few files left before Christmas break. That break wasn't the same as it would be in another occupation simply because it wasn't truly a break at all. They didn't have to come in to do files, but there was always the chance that JJ would get the call of a case, and that they'd all be dragged in over the holidays. It simply wasn't something that they could escape.

Hotch ran a hand through his hair, opening one of the files. It was simple, really, mindless, but it didn't mean he had to like them. They were monotonous, but at least he'd get home early that night.

Or, at least, he thought that he would. It was around that time that he turned to the desktop computer and scrolled to his email, collecting new messages. The first one was from Strauss, information on break and wishing him a Happy Holiday – sent to every agent in the Behavioral Analysis Unit. The second message was from Penelope Garcia, and the heading was in all capitals, labeled as _IMPORTANT_.

He moved the cursor over the message and opened it, with no clue of what was inside. Anything important – a new case, for instance – he would have heard about already, and he honestly couldn't think of anything else that important on their last day of work.

Unless something was wrong, of course.

He began to read the message inside, his heart pounding.

_**Important! **_

**You're invited! **

_This is a special message from the likes of Jennifer Jareau and Penelope Garcia. She, dictating, me, Penelope, writing. She didn't say to put that part, but I did anyway. This message is going to everyone on our happy little team. _

_**Time: **__Today, 6:00 PM_

_**Place: **__The hotel next to the law office. JJ'll send directions. _

_**Bring**__: Your furry little selves! And holiday cheer. _

_We know it's short notice, but it's not like we could plan this early. It was all too easy to be called away on a case at the last minute. Now that that's _nearly_ improbable, the ballroom's decorated and you're all invited! So let's go. _

_Oh, and this isn't negotiable. Bring some damn holiday cheer. _

_-JJ (with some Garcia.) _


End file.
